Out of the five classes I had today, four of them had diagnostic assessment tests. And the other one was PE. Christ.

Today I wore my only and magnificent black corset. That makes me feel happy. Corsets are fine. Reallyyy fine.

Anyway, tomorrow I may go to a party in a village nearby. It may be fun. It may be better than classes. Actually, there's just one class to go before the weekend. I can barely believe it.

Just dropped by to say something. Anything at all. School has started, I'm supposed to have an awful lot of things to say. Unfortunatly, I don't. No one's the guts to teach me how to laugh in a evil way. All the jokes seem shallow. Gosh, I'm even missing the past 16-year-old me. She was so within the lines. Nothing like the girl I've turned into, again.

Who should I grow up to be, anyway?

Just read the title. And listen to this awsome song (coz wherever I go, I'll always keep every moment I had in my life right here beneath my hand):

The Birthday Massacre
Remember Me

It's safe to say I'm lonely now
A place called home is just a memory away
I know I've done this all before
A thousands silent voices begging me to stay

Apologies all left unsaid
Secrets better left unspoken
Dreams laid down and put to bed
Rumors stirred and reawoken

And if I try to get away
How long until I'm free?
And if I don't come back here
Will you remember me?

It's safe to say there's nothing now
It's all so quiet but I can't forget the sound
A thousand voices call my name
A thousand hands that pull me back down to the ground

I turn away from what you are
Denying all that you have given
I find a place thats safe and far
In time all will be forgiven

And if I try to get away
How long until I'm free?
And if I don't come back here
Will you remember me?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5A7zWFiFXWw

Labels: corset, Remember Me, tests, The Birthday Massacre, the other me

So, do you want to know what the hell is the title about? School. Yeah, boring topic, I know. Anyway. Today was my last first day of school.

One moment of silence, please.

Ok, enough mourning. I only had two classes today. It was almost like I was still on holidays. Tomorrow's going to be muuuuch worse. Classes from 8.20 a.m. to 8.00 p.m. Oh damn right I'm serious.

Worse. Tomorrow I'll have tests. Diagnostic tests. I could have had one today, but luckily I'm not having any more Chemistry this year (thank God or whoever divination made this possible)!

On the other hand, I started with my new English class today. Gosh, could they be anymore boring?... Filthy boot-suckers, I'd like to call them. But hey, let's give them a chance. Can't be worse than the previous class... --'

Which reminds me, this afternoon I had a great deal of fun thanks to one of the guys from the so-called 'previous class'. Me and my friends made fun of him for a really long time by cell... I cried so hard from all the laughing. But still. I wanna get out of here. My small town is diminishing to the point when it is too small for me. Sad, yes. But true.

So, this will be the final year. And so, that's how it feels. To know. I mean, to know I'm gonna be leaving the nest anytime soon. The sooner the better... :D

'Some boys take a beautiful girl and hide her away from the rest of the world; I wanna be the one to walk in the sun!, when the working day is done.'

Labels: English, girls wanna have fun, school

I woke up in the best mood. I don't know whether it is because of the dream I had (it involved solving a crime and making out with a hot guy) or because I'm rested, or because I'm gonna meet a friend of mine's today that I haven't seen for almost 2 months!... :D I just feel happy!

I already showered and am now listening to Rewards by Tystnaden, and all this ambience and the window with its shutters semi-closed, and the promise that school is about to begin, putting an end to my lonely misery is really taking the best of me and putting it on jumping activities and "hey-ho"'s and an endless really clumsy dancing all over the places we only visit when we dream.

God, I must be a teenager still, aren't I? Yesterday I was in the worst mood I could possibly be, and now I'm just... glad! :)

I've only three more days of freedom, and still am not at all worried about it =P I mean, what could possibly go wrong?... I'm coming back to my girls (mostly), man!... Maybe just for one more year, but when I'm with them, I tend to forget good things come to an end. And now I know, I may find good people out there. Whenever I leave.

Labels: dreams, friends, happiness, leaving, Tystnaden

Enough said.

Labels: no tags can make anything right.

The day before yesterday, I came back from ten of the best days of my life. We call it EJC, though, in English, the translation'd be something such as Science Youth Meeting.

And all I have to say is: I'll never feel like an outcast again. Because this time I found FRIENDS. Like, people nice enough to keep in touch with. Like, people who don't judge me, but people to whom I can relate to.

Like, for real.

I could describe those days, but there's a reason I didn't come writing in this blog right away. And that reason is: I'm too happy just remembering. Just trying to picture every detail in my head.

For once, I'm not having the urge to write about it. Because it went well. It went really well.

I'm leaving a poem I wrote there in my other blog. It's in Portuguese, in case you're wondering. It's not about anything that happened there, but it was written in a state of profound focusness (if there is such a word). I had a friend sleeping with her feet on my lap, and there was a guy playing guitar. It just felt great writing in such conditions.

And that's the meaning I found. Friendship.

Labels: friends, friendship, meaning, writing